Monday, June 25, 2007

I'm ok, just a bug...

Well, today's post was going to be very sad, then I talked to a nurse and found out the baby and I are fine. If you want details, continue reading below.

Since last week, I have not been feeling like myself. I never had severe morning sickness with this pregnancy, but some food aversions and nausea. That all went away for a week or two and then came back only worse. Tuesday I went home early, Wednesday, I worked from home. Thusday and Friday I didn't feel great, I would sort of feel better in spurts. And in the TMI department, I had diarrhea off and on since last Tuesday.

Saturday M and I took a bus tour of the area to see what the tourists see and as the morning went on, my back started killing me, and then I got nauseated. I ended up throwing up on the bus, fortunately the tour was almost over and we were on the way back to our cars. I spent the rest of Saturday curled in a ball with severe back and stomach aches. I couldn't figure out if the stomach thing was crampy or muscular, it was all over and unlike anything I experienced before. The combination reminded me of the hour or 2 before my miscarriage, except I had no bleeding. I thought about calling triage, but they wouldn't do anything unless I had severe blood loss so I just took Tylenol and suffered. I also experienced cold chills and hot flashes, also symptoms I had during my miscarriage. I had a slight fever too, not enough that my pregnancy book said I needed to call the doctor, but it was elevated.

Sunday I woke up and my back ache and fever were gone. My stomach still hurt but the pain was in a smaller area and not as intense. I made 2 cakes for a friend's baby shower and was really looking forward to going that afternoon. M & I went out to lunch with my in-laws who we haven't seen in about a month. They talked a lot about the upcoming baby to the point where I almost asked them to talk about sports or something else, but fortunately the conversation finally shifted on it's own. It still made me pretty emotional but I hate to make a big deal out of things.

Later when we were in the car, I told M that it is hard to talk about the future of the baby when I am not sure he (or she) is still alive, and that comment started the flood of tears. I remembered that one of my friend's is a PA and that she would be at the shower so I decided maybe if she was able to hear the heartbeat, I would calm down. Unfortunately when I called her I started bawling before I could ask and M had to tell me that a stethoscope is not powerful enough to hear the baby (at least not yet). She asked what my symptoms were that were making me worry and M was not sure since he thought I had been feeling better. We drove past the hospital but again, with no bleeding, they probably wouldn't even see me and they weren't going to do anything. I told M I didn't want to go.

We tried to find a store in town that rents Dopplers, with no luck, but did find at Babies 'R Us a device that is supposed to allow you to hear the baby's heartbeat. Once we opened the package we found out that it won't really work until the 3rd trimester (it doesn't say that anywhere on the outside of the package). By the time I played around with it and listed to my own heartbeat and digestion, I was rational enough to decide that I probably just got emotional and I could try to get in to see my doctor Monday (today). We were lazy the rest of the day. I did have to call several friends to tell them what was going on since they were all with the PA friend and were worried.

This morning when I woke up my stomach felt fine until I started walking to work. I called my doctor's office and the receptionist told me they were already overbooked for today but that I could call triage. Without crying, I managed to tell her that they won't do anything. She put me on hold and I started crying and wishing my new doctor's office could see me this week instead of next. She ended up transferring me to a nurse. I explained to the nurse all my symptoms and that I had a miscarriage (exactly 4 months ago today) and some of my symptoms were very similar. As I was talking, I calmed down and my voice regained some confidence. She asked a few questions and then said it sounded like I had something viral and involving my GI tract. I can take Imodium (I thought it was on the do not take list) and to drink plenty of fluids. I feel so much better now and she is right. If I never had a miscarriage, I would have assumed I had the flu or something and lived my life without worrying about the baby. I guess my view is somewhat jaded and now I always think the worst.


Melanie said...

I'm glad everything turned out okay. I agree with you, after having a miscarriage, you always think the worst, it's hard not to. Just take it easy :)

Tina said...

I am so, so glad everything appears to be okay, and that it was just viral.

As much as I want to get PG again and give Chris a sibling, this part terrifies me - thinking the worst with every sign that looks similar to a previous miscarriage.

Hope you are feeling better - physically and emotionally.

ultimatejourney said...

What a relief! I'm sorry you had such a tough weekend, but I'm glad everything is okay.

Chris said...

Oh what a scary weekend! I don't blame you at all for what you have been feeling, in fact, it sounds like you held it together far better than I ever would have. I hope that you are back to feeling normal and preggers!

Anne Marie said...

I'm so sorry that you went through this...and I want to encourage you to build a relationship with a doctor so that you feel confident going in when you are that frightened regardless of whether you are bleeding or not! It will do you good to have someone to rule things out for you as you go through this pregnancy.